Everyone In The World Is Stupid Except Me...

Alright, so that isn't true by any means, but it sure felt good to say.

So, my loyal readers, time to hear me rant for a moment or two.

Guess who pretty much lost another commission thanks to events and individuals completely out of his hands? Guess what that means for us?

1.  We have no money, and no prospects for money for a while.
2.  This means that my maternal instincts are causing me to want to tear someone's (anyone's) eyes out since our  financial situation only allows us to pay for rent, gas, some food, and utilities. Oh, and diapers. Our house would smell bad without diapers. I am thankful Anya is too little for baby food and has lots of clothing given to us for when she gets bigger. Since I breastfeed, we don't buy formula. On a side note, right after I talked about my house smelling bad without diapers, a smelly diaper smell wafted over to me. Oh the irony that makes up my life...
3. This also means that I am forced to watch my husband struggle emotionally without being able to do a single thing to make it better for him. This is probably the hardest thing about all of this. I strive to be supportive, but he, as a man, needs to be able to provide for his family. When I say this, I don't mean that I refuse to work because a man should take care of me. (If I thought that, I'd loathe me.) This attitude of needing to provide is part of Daniel's character. He has been looking for another job, but hasn't been able to land one yet. This is so hard on him as well. Watching the man I love struggle so much is very much tearing me apart.

Alright, rant's over. I am very thankful for the things we do have. We don't have any debt. We have a decent place to live and the rent isn't outrageous. Anya's smiles can lift our spirits no matter how low we feel.

Aww, speaking of whom, just woke up with the cutest, saddest little face at realizing she needs a new diaper. Poor diaper baby.